Facts and Footsteps - By Jack Melichar

I have spent the last few weeks raising money for the AIDS Walk. This will be the third year I have participated, and it is, by far, the most difficult. It seems to me, and this may only be conjecture, that several factors – so many "walks" are bunched so closely together, the highest unemployment rate we have seen in some time, the Wall Street melt down and all of the other activities, both here and in Phoenix, – have joined forces to create a perfect storm. However, the only major changes since last year are the state of the economy and the Wall Street fiasco of greed and incompetence. While I would love to be able to lay all of these factors at the feet of Shrub (thank you Molly Ivins), every once in awhile, I allow the facts, rather than my acknowledged bias, to dictate what I write. Damned inconvenient things are facts!

It is amazing to me that the current occupant, the "decider," or the Ninny in Chief – call him what you will, has been able to take the healthy economy he inherited in 2000and with the help of McDeregulatorCain, flush it down the toilet. Many thanks, you idiots! (Oh, it feels so good to allow my prejudices to run wild!)

The other problem we fund raisers face if the psychology of the donors, particularly the old goats who love to point out that they are on a "fixed income." Fixed income my ***! (I know you kiddies will be surprised to learn that I am old enough to collect Social Security – after all, I don't look a day over 90!) I am quick to point out to the geezer group that we are not on a "fixed income," for we get a raise every year, which is more than a lot of people can say – so quit whining and get a life!

Finally, I want to remind you, boys and girls, that you have only a few days left to seize the opportunity of a lifetime. Never again will you be given the chance to support me , at the age of 67, in the AIDS Walk. Next year I will turn 68! If by some incompetence on my part I overlook you, do not hesitate to chase me down. I will be more than happy to relieve you of some cash!